Big Tech people are actually lost

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Life is very tricky. When you think jobless people are sad and miserable while big tech people are happy and safe, it might turn out to be quite the opposite sometimes.

She used 10 minutes to leave Google.

Yesterday, I went to Google to visit a friend of mine; she looked like she was in serious trouble with her work. She was a Google APM, with a 0.6% global acceptance rate. Her inbox is always flooded with admiration.

She told me she wasn’t happy because of the value misalignment and politics. She wanted to rest and to leave. To be fairly honest, big tech politics and problems are quite well known if you are in one of them. I saw multiple cases in my friend’s life. Some really ridiculous. When she talked to me, I could sense the pain inside her.

So we decided to go on a 10-minute meditation. Ten minutes later, she said, “I’m going to see my therapist to discuss my medical leave.”

I was shocked! What? After a 10-minute meditation?

People usually say I’m a bit crazy, but my friend is just as crazy, if not crazier than I am. She went out, got everything signed, informed her team, and finished everything in 3 hours. When lost, people aren’t lost for a moment; they do crazy things.

10 miserable years at Microsoft

This morning, I went to meet a new friend, who worked on machine learning at Microsoft for 10 years. I told my friend’s crazy story.

He said, “Yes. I was so miserable at Microsoft, and all my friends working in Big Tech now are miserable too.”

“But a big tech job is still better. At least you are financially stable and miserable, not poor and miserable.”

I asked him what he planned to do after he quit. He said he was as lost as I am. Wow! But he was so much older than me! He is still lost? It means that age is probably not a determining factor for being lost or not. We are probably just lost as humans anyway!

What gives us a fulfilling life?

Free food, so much money, mostly chill work, and a stable life, but many people are still miserable anyway. Then, what gives us a fulfilling life? I wonder.

We seek things people praise and try so hard to reach them: a lot of money, a good job, and a decent reputation. But when we actually reach the top, it’s just not as beautiful as society tells us. The moment I realized it, was the moment I dropped out of my university.

What is the point of climbing then?

Over this year, I felt stronger and stronger that I’m the only one who can define a fulfilling life for myself. And, I need to have the courage to do that. No matter how much unknown, how rare this path looks. It doesn’t promise a fulfilling life, but every step I take is fulfilling.

I want to explore, to discover, and to experience the infinite possibilities of life. I feel scared but open-minded, confused but excited, and lost but curious. What will happen next?

I started to find the unpredictability of life fascinating. I think my life will probably be a fun play!

Let me share a self-intro website that I make for a company I’m applying to today. And I creepily deliver it to their company door because I think I want to invite everyone to play and enjoy this life!

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