In search of discipline
I used to think discipline was for serious, high-achieving people, not for me. However, since graduating last year, I’ve come to realize more and more of its importance.
The reason is quite obvious. Being in school creates a structured form of discipline. We had to attend class at 8 a.m., finish assignments by Thursday, and follow the routine our classmates did after school. After graduation, you start to design your life the way you want it to be.
There are no exams or grades anymore, so there’s no short-term goal to chase. How do you want to spend your time after work? More work, hobbies, dating, or something else?
As I’ve been learning about craftsmanship and navigating difficult jobless periods, I’ve understood the importance of building a professional network and continuously improving my skills as an immigrant in the US. I cannot rest on my laurels. This is where discipline comes in.
But cultivating discipline is hard, and most people struggle with it. For instance, many friends want to write like me and are, in fact, much better writers. However, when I started my writing journey by publishing every day for 60 days, none of them could keep up. They admired my effort, saying, “Wow! I don’t think I can do it every day by myself!” Most people struggle with it because they believe they’re practicing their writing skills, but in reality, they’re actually practicing developing better discipline.
Nowadays, I’ve started more new practices. For instance, I post on Twitter every day about what I learn or build, which I’ve been doing since March. For technical knowledge, I log it in a “Today I Learned” app I built. It’s simple, it’s stupid, but it’s effective.
During my jobless + heartbreak period, I developed other disciplines, such as exercising in the morning to maintain my happiness and productivity. Recently, when I became lazy and stopped exercising for a few days, I noticed my mind became fuzzy, I felt grumpy, and my productivity dropped significantly.
“Talent isn’t about having a gift; it’s about having discipline, grit, patience, and loving the process.” — Roger Federer
I believe we can be good at whatever we want if we practice enough. The challenge, however, is maintaining that practice once the initial excitement fades. How can we apply discipline to ourselves to keep practicing patiently?
I want to tell you the discipline around my law student friend. He wakes up every day at 9 a.m. and studies consistently until bedtime, without taking breaks for weekends or leisure. He uses a timer to ensure he studies for 10 hours every day, excluding time spent planning his study sessions or taking breaks to scroll through his phone. No wonder he is top of the top. Sitting next to him until 10:30 p.m. almost every day, I find it hard to slack off seeing how hardworking he is.
You might ask, “What if you’re overworking yourself?” On the contrary, discipline doesn’t encourage overworking in a way that harms health and energy. Good athletes don’t practice excessively and then rest for an entire week; they work consistently every day. Discipline fosters long-term patience rather than seeking short-term gratification. I’m learning to do this more and perform better.
One crucial aspect I’ve noticed is self-understanding. It might sound dumb and obvious, but it’s about finding ways to work with myself. For instance, I know it’s unrealistic to write a research post about education every single day, but I give myself kudo as long as I publish something daily. For my “Today I Learn” posts, I use both Twitter and a note-taking app to make the process work minimally, as I’m too busy working to maintain comprehensive notes every day. (That’s why my app uses AI to organize my messy learning notes!)
Many people see discipline as an uncomfortable force exerted on oneself. However, I view it as an exploration of how to work with my natural tendencies within the constraints of reality.
- How to motivate Esther to do 5 more minutes when she is tired of it?
- How is this new discipline connected to Esther’s innate joy?
- If Esther cannot find an evening co-work friend, what opportunities does she have?
While most people criticize themselves when they fail to stick to their routines, I’ve learned to cultivate an attitude of playfulness, experimentation, and encouragement. That’s just the approach Esther accepts.
Recently, I’ve been trying to create a discipline of working on important things after my day job to prepare myself for the future. Here is the progress so far:
- I can work using pen and paper because my eyes and hands are not happy with long keyboard and screen use. So, my current work often involves learning new knowledge.
- I can work until 10:30 p.m. as long as I have a healthy and tasty dinner and sit next to my law student friend.
- I am minimizing negative or distracting stimuli e.g. dating, clubbing, gossipy people, ungrounded people
- My law friend is leaving the U.S., so my next step is to figure out how to have healthy and tasty dinners and work on my own. Okay, I’m brainstorming on the fly!
Here are some new ideas:
- I can prepare good food on weekends or work remotely more.
- I can reduce my work time to 30 minutes a day after he leaves as a new starting point.
- I can try finding a new high-quality co-working partner.
- Is there a co-working space in the city that allows cooking?
- Can I redesign my study desk to make it more attractive?
Please let me know if you have more ideas!
