This is who I am, this is how I show up today

Recently, I found myself overwhelmed by the weight of many things — my job, moving to a new place, and the tangled emotions I hold for others.

There were so many voices in my head:

“You need to work harder.” But I’m already working so hard.

“How will I manage moving the entire house and furnishing it alone?” But I’ve tried to prepare as best I can.

“What if I can’t find new housemates and cover all the costs myself?” But I don’t have the energy to deal with this right now.

“Why do I have such strong feelings for this person?” But I can’t control how I feel.

I broke down, collapsing onto the sofa after a particularly stressful call about housing. It felt like I was the only person in the world burdened with all these problems. Even though I have many friends in the city, I realized there wasn’t anyone I felt comfortable turning to in this state of anxiety. The sofa became a refuge, but it was also a place where my insecurity, stress, fear, and confusion piled up around me.

A few days later, a friend sent me a 6-minute voice note. She was stressed too — she hadn’t found a job and was running out of money, with only enough left for one more month. If she couldn’t find work, she’d have to leave the U.S. and return to her home country.

But instead of complaining, she said,

“I feel stressed every day, especially when I buy things. But I know I’m still trying hard to honor the career values that matter to me.

We all get stressed sometimes. This is just who I am today. This is just how I’m showing up now.”

Why do we always feel like we need to fix something in our lives? Why can’t I just accept things as they are?

Life doesn’t always go with our intentions. This is me — I’m stressed, have emotions, feel fear, and experience insecurity. But this is who I am, and this is how I’m showing up today.